Candy & Bloodshed

Let's dive straight into the chocolate river:

More like the chocolate river of BLOOD!

7. Batoru rowaiaru (Battle Royale) (2000)- If a movie has opening credits like this, greatness is apparent:

That also saves me explaining the premise of the movie (why shit is happening). What is happening is this: a bunch of high school senior equivilent students are but on a desrted island. They are given weapons. And the last one alive wins. Japanese be crazy! It's actually somewhat similar to the new-ish book series aimed at Hunger Games [First one is solid, second one is decent, haven't read the third one]. I guess this plot is done a bunch, not sure what would be considered the first one. Anyway, let's let this lady explain the rules in more detail:

This movie is basically filled with over the top violence. It should be a sirius movie, but instead Battle Royale  is hilarious.

So even though there is this over the top violence, people dying left and right, and humor, there is also the sense of drama. A connection is formed with the main characters and you hope for them to survive. The movie also includes some side characters with their own compelling plot lines. Also, there are flashbacks and backstory 'n stuff.
The movie is goddamn entertaining. Isn't that whats important?

Some people even find time to relax on this island of death.

Battle Royale is actually based on a book of the same name by Koushun Takami. The book is actually better in sense. You don't see the over the top violence. But the collars are more relevant and more characters have personalities. Also the ending and part of the main plot is altered for the movie, and I prefer the book version. Also, the book's cover is better than the movie's.





Sadly a Hollywood remake was scratched because of the Virginia Tech shooting and the sensitivity about killing high school students. A country of prudes I say.


IMDB: 7.9
RT: 82%

6. Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (1971)-
FF (fun fact...or frivolous ferrets or w.e): The oldest movie in my top 20. Actually, it's tied with three other movies for oldest in my top 50 (the other two are A Clockwork Orange at #22 and Viimne reliikvia (The Last Relic) at #29)

A large contrast to the previous movie. 5 children, along with their guardians are locked in a crazy man's mad house and are killed off one by one off screen by painted midgets.....wait, that may give you the wrong impression....

AAAANyway, this movie is based on Roald Dahl's (one of the greatest authors of all time) book Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.  It is a fantastic tale full of wonders, as per usual with his books. It makes the movie transition very well. The set design is superb.

That's a goddamn chocolate waterfall (not raw sewage)

The cast is also good. Gene Wilder is Willy Wonka. And he is fantastic. I actually don't really like him so much, as he has a tendency to yell, which is annoying. But he is a good fit in this movie. And the two main scenes where he strains his vocal chords are actually awesome.

Yes....this is a movie meant for children.....
Also Phoenix Wrong remix (6:00)

The "you lose. good day, sir" line has been remixed a bunch on youtube, btw.


The boy who plays Charlie looks like an adorable kid and plays the good, perfect little boy. Quite bland and uninteresting, as these saint-like characters tend to be. The other brats however are just that. Obviously terrible children.

The movie has great singing numbers in it (I guess this film is sorta like a musical....maybe) including four excellent songs by the Oompa Loompas (which were terribly butchered in the remake). Oh ya, there was that remake by Tim Burton in 2005 in starring Johnny Depp as Wonka. Let's just ignore that movie, since it isn't nearly as good as the old one. And lets listen to the musical stylings of midget clowns.
*Also, I guess these are pretty major spoilers, but w.e. It's not such a big deal for a movie like this.*

Also that "dance" in the last one. I'm bad at editing, so I won't point out which one specifically...I'll maybe do it in the future, who knows....

IMDB: 7.8
RT: 90%

Ummm...next week....theme....uhhhh....both movies are pretty violent. Don't live up to Battle Royale....but still...

Into the single digits we go

Let's just go for it, and not have some long irrelevant paragraph at the beginning. It just seems that at the beginning of each post I need to have some sort of joke or something. And I always manage to get off topic.... Extremely off topic. But I guess it is like in books, where the first sentence/paragraph need to catch the reader, entice them to continue on.....
......
... goddamnit! I've done it again.

9. The Truman Show (1998) - Jim Carrey is obviously one of the greatest comedy actors. It has got to be between him and Will Ferrell for the all-time best. BUT Jim Carrey also has some sirius roles, like The Truman Show. And he is so great in those movies as well. It seems a shame that he hasn't done more movies like The Truman Show, Man on the Moon, and another not-yet-to-be-named movie.
But ya, Carrey's performance is great, and considering what roles get nominated, let alone win the best actor Oscar (I'm looking at you Anthony Hopkins for Silence of the Lambs), it is astounding he didn't even get nominated. He should have won damnit!
Another movie with a very unique plot. Seems to be a trend on this list, eh? Jim Carrey is unknowingly part of a television show. A giant set has been built under a dome... well it's basically one town, with some surroundings. Truman (Carrey) lives is life, but there are cameras everywhere and all the other people are just actors. He is the only true man.... get it? HAHAHAHA. To him, his world is a stage... literally
(A Shakespeare reference!? Shit just got real).

Sounds like shows like Big Brother or any MTV reality show. But notice, that this was made in 1998. The movie makes the statement that people are too entertainment/TV driven that is only becoming more relevant as time go by. Somewhat similar to Amelie, this movie is way ahead of the curve. Obviously I'm not really listening to the message being conveyed. But that doesn't matter, as the movie is thoroughly enjoying anyway.
I may have been misleading, when I said this is a serious movie. It has a lot of comedy in it, but it isn't the usual slapstick and such that is present in most pure comedies.
It's more like the previous clip, and other such oddeties i.e. commercials

Also, the movie got nominated for 3 Oscars including Ed Harris for best supporting actor.

 

He has a beret, and he lost?! Blasphemy!

IMDB: 8.0
RT: 95%

And another story of altered "reality":

8. The Matrix (1999) -  Well, if you haven't seen it, you have to know about it at least, so I'm not going to delve into it. This movie is crazy iconic with a lot of quotable n stuffs. I'll just show a bunch of clips.

Keanu Reeves is great. Not necessarily a great actor....but he is just great, weather he is in the Matrix or on a speeding bus. But the real star of the movie, and series is Agent Smith played by Hugo Weaving. That man is bad-ass. Or maybe just has great diction. One or the other. There is just something about him. Also, he is so awesome that Agent deserves to be capitalized

These are from the first movie, the one that is so tooootally awesome:

The first confrontation of protagonist and antagonist:

Screw waterboarding, just have Hugo Weaving recite the dictionary to those terrorists:
 

These clips are from the much inferior sequels (however, Hugo is still awesome x infinity):

Best entrance ever? Yes!

Also, this little diddy:

Creepy-as-hell face anyone?

BtW, The Matrix basically invented the ever parodied "bullet time," or at east made it popular. Well, mainly these two clips.

The movie combines deep philosophical discussions by the few black people in the movie (Morpheus and the Oracle) ....and Agent Smith as well.... with pure badass action among the whites ... including Agent Smith. Take what you will from that,  I was just making an observation.
And to seal this movie review, the most badass scene in the movie:

IMDB: 8.7
RT: 86%

Oh, wait. I forgot one thing: The Matrix Has You.
Props to LegendaryFrog on all of his videos.

For next time there is no similar theme...rather too very contrasting films. Very contrasting.

And then there was two

Well these are technically numbers XI and X, but i figured, with my math genius brain, that if i do it in intervals of two, then I'll have 1st place left over for a separate post.

Also, I had finals and stuff...hence the lack of updates. Now that the winter break is starting, I'll try to be more consistent.
SOOOOO.....

11. Le Fabuleux destin d'Amélie Poulain (2001) aka Amelie - Only one of two non-US films to make it into my top 20. This basically falls into the slightly over-saturated genre of indie romantic comedy, though it came out, as you may have noticed, in 2001, which is years before the genre got very popular. It features a quirky lady and some odd dude, and they fall in love. So it's like almost some Zooey Deschanel movie, except it's French. And I must say,  Audrey Tautou (Amelie) is just as adorable as Zooey.

Goddamn adorable!

The movie has a great, quirky sense of humor, via narration at times.

As I said....goddamn adorable.

A warm, happy romcom featuring a serious of odd events. The perfect film in a genre that, unfortunately, has become full of just awful movies.

IMDB: 8.6
RT: 90%

starting my top ten, I actually have a movie from 2010. How exciting:
or maybe "how fun" would be better, Hans Landa?

(Ah. He was just awesome. Oscar well deserved....we-ell de-serv-ed.)


Ahem! On to the next movie

10. Scott Pilgrim vs the World (2010) - I  blogged about it, when I got the DVD....yes, I actually bought this movie. That's how great it is.
A good summery about this movie could be: The worst part of it was that it ended. I would give where credit is due, since that is not my original line. HOWever, this so called fan of the movie gave it a 9/10. How he gives any movie a 10 is beyond me.

Plot: Scott (Michael Cera) wants to date Ramona Flowers (Mary Elizabeth Winstead). To achieve his goal he has to defeat her seven evil exes. Simple.
The main criticism with this movie (other than old people, who don't understand video games/comic books) is that seven evil exes is too much; it gets repetitive. To that I say Wrong! (i think I've used that link before, but it's just too great). All the fights are different and awesome. It's complete with comic book style POWs and Street Fighter-like shots, split screen, etc. And after winning a fight Scott gets some coins.

Ready....FIGHT!

OW...My stomach lining!!

It features some cool cuts and edits accompanied with some "epic" sound effects. Similar too director Edgar Wrights other awesome movies Shaun of the Dead and  Hot Fuzz.

Also, for all you Micheal Cera haters out there, who say he plays the same character in every movie- the awkward teen. Scott is not the same. At times, yes, he is quite awkward, especially towards the beginning. But at times he gets pretty hardcore (fight scenes) and is sometimes a jerk.
The supporting cast is also great. Especially, Scott's gay roommate Wallace (Kieran Culkin). He provides some of the best lines in a movie full of epic things said. To be honest, they aren't really all that "quotable", but still in the context of the movie, there is a lot hilarity.

....all in all, everything is great. Visuals, cast, script, sound effects
oh, ya, and it has a great soundtrack. indie rock n' stuff (beck, etc).

Sadly, as I mentioned in my previous post, it wasn't a commercial success. My generation (and younger) being the target audience; people who play video games and read comic books (I don't read comic books actually, but i appreciate them). We, as a collective, don't really like paying for stuff when it's on the internet for free.

AND here... is my favorite moment:

IMDB: 7.9
RT: 80%

Next time we'll look at two movies, where what we see isn't necessarily real.
OOooo....what a tease. What could they be?! I'm excited for one.

Why is 6 afraid of 7?

Because 12 13 14!......wait, I think I messed that up...Damn it!  Well enough procrastinating with my top movie countdown. I got finals and stuff coming up, so I might actually have to do some work! fuck that shit.

Today we got the aforementioned 12, 13, 14, which features two movies that I doubt you'd find on other lists.

14. The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993) - Second of three animated movies in my top 20. Though this technically isn't animated, its stop-motion, but I just lump them in the same group. Deal with it! 4
It has quite a unique story. The ruler of the Halloween world, somehow gets into Christmas land, and then is like, "I want that!". Like most animated movies, there are a lot of songs (well, I guess nowadays animated flicks don't really have those anymore)...So like older animated movies, like Lion King and such, the pre-Pixar era, its sort of like a musical at times. The songs are made by the very talented Danny Elfman, who you should know if you are familiar with moving pictures. He's done the soundtrack for like a ballion different films. Anyways, Nightmare's soundtrack is just one of the best. Some would actually argue that the movies music is annoying, like this tooooootally gay on rottentomatoes....well it is only that one jerk. Send all your hate to him please. It isn't directed, but rather produced by Tim Burton. Some would say, that this means Tim Burton just gave it money and did nothing else. But I'd like to believe that he had some sort of creative control, because this film just exudes his dark style. And maybe shouldn't really be shown to easily fightened children....
An intro to Halloweentown:

As you saw, the various citizens of Halloweentown look just awesome. And the main character, Jack Skellington is just plain bad-ass:

Comes in two flavors: friendly

and not so much

What's so great aboot it, is that it's a mash-up of two (very different) holidays, so you can watch this biannually, to celebrate Christmas and Halloween.


IMDB: 8.0
RT: 97%

13. SLC Punk!  (1999) - I doubt any of you have really heard of this movie. I stumbled upon it based on its lead actor, Matthew Lilliard. Most of you might recognize him as Shaggy from the Scooby Doo movies. Well I saw him there and other places, and then I remember seeing him in a movie a whiiiiile back. That turned out to be Dead Man's Curve, which is nowhere to be found on the internet. If someone could find it for me, that would be greeeeeeat (*to be read in the voice of that guy from office space). But I checked his filmography, and this one seemed interesting, watched it, and loved it.
It's a story of two punks (punk rock enthusiast) in Salt Lake City (SLC) one of the most conservative places like evar. Stevo (Matthew Lilliard) serves as a narrator, to introduce other characters and such, a technique used in many films. The supporting characters are interesting, and the stories Stevo tells about them are quite amusing. For example, an anecdote featuring the lead from Final Destination (the first one), crazy from LSD and with green hair (though not technically narrated by Stevo):

I'll admit there isn't a strong overarching story (though there is a good underlying message), its just about the guys in SLC and their adventure. It's not all fun and games, as there are some serious notes in the film as well. But the ride was so enjoyable, that I don't really care that the overall story wasn't strong. After finding this film, I've started looking at actors/actresses filmographies, hoping to find some lesser known gems, such as this. Also, Matthew Lilliard is awesome, and it is a shame he never really became mainstream.

IMDB: 7.3
RT: 63% (but 89% fan vote)

12. The Fox and the Hound (1981) - I realize this movie isn't as good as most other animated movies. But this one just has the nostalgia factor for me. So i like it more than the average viewer. It's a simple tale of forbidden friendship, between a neighboring young fox and a young pup hunting dog. It has some unnecessary supporting characters....they maybe should have focused on the two main characters more.
But aren't they just goddamn adorable?

Like Nightmare it has a few musical numbers, but not as many, and not as memorable. There are however two extremely low points. One of them is my number two most depressing scene of all time (number one being the final scene in About Schmidt). Just like fairytale, it amazes me how horrifying events there are in children's tales. Proof of that, is the opening:

IMDB: 7.1
RT: 68%


Also, in shameless self-promotion, I have accounts on IMDB and RT (profile: Reigntall on both), where I post some of my reviews (altered slightly for obvious reasons), so if you could maybe, say my reviews were useful (IMDB), or give them a thumbs up (RT) that would be superspecialawesome.

Technology...

 SO now that the mourning period is over, I can continue blogging. (Between you and me, I was just being lazy, and didn't feel like posting anything. But don't tell anyone else, ok?).

Anyway, as I was saying: Technology is.....

So I am hoping this gem that I found will net me some straight cash homie, but at the moment they are pretty worthless. What am I talking about? This:

This is a laserdisc, the precursor to modern day cds and dvds. I won't explain in detail how I optained these, but I now have about 15 movies.

And yes, they are god damn humongous(1:00). Here is more proof:

Note the hand-drawn peppers in the background. My uncle's fine work.

*Note: I have a big head.
Now you maybe asking, "Can you really fit an entire movie on those discs?
First, I'd like to say, stop asking so many goddamn questions. I'll get to it eventually, geez!
Second, no, you cannot. Those discs are double sided. And most movies seem to require an additional 3rd side (2nd laserdisc, with only one side containing any data....not just half a laserdisc....)

So basically every popular movie in the early 90s got the laserdisc (I just like saying that word...sounds fancy) treatment, as did many classics (2001: A Space Odyssey, Godfather, etc). So if one were to have this laserdisc technology, and could purchase any of these movies for a decent amount of money, what would one buy? Well my new collection consists of such all-time greats as: Top Gun, Star Trek VI, Die Hard 2, The Abyss. Though I do also have some actually good movies, like Mrs. Doubtfire, The Fugative, E.T. and the creme de la creme sealed copies of Blazing Saddles and Jurrasic Park. And a collector's edition of the original Star Wars trilogy. Too bad they are all pretty worthless......Maybe I'll just frame them, and show them off, as my platinum music records  =D.


Well, I personally didn't know of this piece of technology's existence, and I hope you learned something too. If I was any good at drawing, I'd probably add the laserdisc to the following picture: